Short Jokes: The Dying Man & The Two Janitors

The Dying Man

Cooney's doctors him, " You have an incurable disease. There's nothing I can do."

Cooney says, " Do you have any advice for me at all?"

The doctor says, "Take 3 mud baths a day."

Cooney says, "Will that prolong my life?"

The doctor says, "No but it'll get you used to the dirt."


The Two Janitors

Igor and Nikita, 2 janitors at a Russian power plant, find a weird-smelling container at work. Figuring it's cheap vodka, they drink the liquid inside. In the middle of the night, Igor calls Nikita and says, "Do you know what was in the container? Rocket fuel."

Nikita says, "It didn't hurt me at all."

Igor says, not yet. But don't fart. I'm calling you from Tokyo."